Posts Tagged ‘Stories :)’

Or…. “I blog therefore I am” LOL…  So I got this shirt for Christmas or a birthday, I don’t remember..LOL

I truly love this shirt!  It causes people to stop and look, and be like…WTH?  So, I figured I would talk about blogging for a change…in my blog….hmmm…

So, I blog, because I can share with you my feelings and thoughts, emotions, dreams, longings and my heart

I love writing, and if I couldn’t write, I might possibly go insane!  I am a creative being and love to share my creativity with the world!!  I really wish I had more people reading my blogs and telling me how uber crazy I am….

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Evening all….

As the day has progressed, I have come into a case of the flumps .

I am not sure how I got here…just that I am here. I think it stems from my weekend dreams…when I actually had time to dream. This weekend was a very restless weekend. Friday night I crawled in bed and watched the Notebook, as mentioned previously, which in turn brings tears to my eyes…that movie never fails to make me cry. Well, of course that lead to those dreams that I didn’t want to have, but happened anyways. I haven’t had a dream about him in over a week. Well then I was up half the night, and couldn’t sleep in. Saturday/Sunday night I had a hard time sleeping as well. Again he was there in my dreams…not like before, it was like seeing him through a haze…never talking…never touching. I just knew that he was there. Last night, same thing, I was awake more often than not, and every time I woke up, my blankets were somewhere different, the only thing that stayed in place was the blanket he gave me.

Seems like I wandered into my flumps. Today seems to just be dragging by, and I look around and I don’t see what I want to see anymore. I see what is here. I am using some of my creative talents, but I am soo not happy with the end product. I guess as an artist, I am allowed to be my own critic as well? We are our own worst critics…. So, I am learning to accept the things that are said about things I do, and try to make an improvement. So, I have a learning curve to go through

So, here I am…thinking about him. Wondering what is going through his head. I am sure that he reads some of these things, and wonders why i am not on some sort of medication…LOL My blogs change like the seasons in fast forward. I amaze myself sometimes when I go back and read them. I wonder sometimes what was going through my mind to make me write this stuff, after I read it, a few weeks or months later. I guess it’s a good thing that I write some of this down. It acts like an outlet, it gives me the chance to release the pent up stuff.

I would probably explode if I had to just carry it all around inside. I think about some of the things that are said to me, and what gets me all worked up in a bad way, and then I multiply that times 100 because that seems to be the intensity that occurs, and yep you would have Kitty Volcano.

I guess I need to wrap this one up…Not that I want to, but I do kinda need to get some work done. I think that is another issue. I love my job…I really do..I just don’t like the schedule….Oh well, it pays the bills, most of the time…

Well, I am outta here for the time being. I will see ya’ll again shortly, I am sure. Don’t forget to check out my stories !!

Hugs and Kisses,

Kitty

I lived once. It was a long time ago, but I lived. I lived in a big house on the beach, with the sound of the ocean beating against the shore. The seagulls flying over head searching the water for food. I loved to feel the wind of the sea on my face and the smell of salt in the air. I lived once. I would walk along the beach, feeling the sand move in between my toes and the cool water running up and down the shoreline. I could hear the scuttle of crabs on the rock jetties, and the call of dolphins on a clear morning. I lived once.

What happened? I don’t really know. I can tell you that I remember the sounds, smells and feel of my seaside home, but I can’t remember where it went. I remember the white house, it was 2 stories and it was on stilts for when the storms came in. There was a wrap around porch, with chairs on every side of the house. It had green window shutters and huge bay windows. There was a hammock on the back side of the house, on the beach line, hanging between two palm trees, so I could swing in the breeze. The kitchen had an open view of the shore, so I could watch the waves crash as I cooked big meals. The master bedroom faced the sea as well, with one wall almost completely glass, and a huge skylight above the bed, so that it would feel like I was sleeping under the stars and on the shore. I lived once. It was amazing to wake up on a clear blue day and see the sky above me, and hear the waves, and just lay in bed with you. I lived once. I didn’t have a TV, I had a radio, and a phone, and a library full of books, and you. What happened?

I was waiting….I remember now. It was a Mid summer day, and I was waiting for you to come home. The radio was playing my favorite song, and I was fixing our favorite dinner. A storm was moving in from the South, and I could see the lightning in the sky and the dark clouds rolling in. I loved the sound of the thunder overhead and when the rain came down it always was a soothing sound. The storm was still at least an hour off, and you still weren’t home yet. You were always good about calling to let me know you were running late. What happened? I finished up dinner, and poured us a glass of wine, I knew you would be here shortly. I waited….the storm rolled closer. I waited. The storm broke over the house with a fierce bolt of lightning and a large clap of Thunder. Then rain came down. There was a knock at the door. What happened? I walked through the house, and opened the front door, and there was a man in uniform, it was blue. He asked me if I was your wife…I looked at him puzzled, and wondered how anyone could know that I wasn’t? What happened? He told me that there had been an accident on the Ferry, and that several cars had gone into the bay. That yours may have been one of them. I told him that wasn’t possible, there had been nothing on the radio, it just wasn’t true. He advised that they hadn’t broadcasted it on the news to keep panic and hysteria down. He told me that the police and coast guard were doing all the could to recover the cars to verify, but in this weather……

What happened? The next 48 hours were miserable. You didn’t come home, your wine glass still sat on the table, dinner uneaten, the radio broadcasting the news that a ferry had gone down in the bay, they were still looking for the bodies. What happened….

I began to cry, knowing you were never coming home. Then I began to scream, then I began to throw things. The walls of our life fell around me, the windows of my soul crashed inside. The tides of change were all around me, and I didn’t know what to do. I lived once. What happened? Where did it all go…..

(to be continued)